~:: eNd Of JoUrNeY *2012* ::~

2012 is leaving... 

Again to myself I keep asking...

. Have I've be the best for the year...

Again to myself I keep asking...

 What will I take with me for another year...

Am I strong enough to keep fighting me..

Am I strong enough to keep being me...

2012 is leaving..

And yet.. I must keep on fighting.. 

~:: *** ::~

~:: mEmBeBaNiKu ::~

Berat yang ku pikul ini.. bukanlah bebananku.. namun ia sebahagian dariku..

Meskipun beratnya melambatkan langkahku... meskipun beratnya melelahkan uratku...

Namun ia tidak sekali mematahkan semangatku...

Berat yang ku pikul ini.. bukanlah beban bagiku.. malah ia adalah pelindungku..

~:: *** ::~

~:: gOnE ::~

What if you lost the one dearest to your heart.. what would you do? 

The one that you have build your hopes and dreams with..

The one that you have promise yourself to grow old with..

What would you do... if one day suddenly is no more there beside you.. for you... 

If that day comes... there is actually nothing you can do... 

but just accepting all has changed...

~:: *** ::~

~:: sHaDoW ::~

I once read.. in the darkest hour.. even your shadow will leave you.. well... for me shadows is also a visible thing that the eyes can see.. yes.. of course you will think it has leave you if it is not visible to your eyes..

But.. does a thing really gone or not even there if it is not visible.. what if.. you can't see it.. but you can feel it.. that can we say it is not there.. or is it there?..

~:: bOlA ::~

Hidup biar umpama bola.. yang sentiasa melantun bila dicampak ke bawah..

Hidup biar umpama bola.. yang jelas detinasi dan arah tujunya yang membawa makna..

Namun hidup janganlah menjadi bola.. yang sesenangnya ditendang sesiapa saja...

~:: *** ::~

~:: bIaRkAnLaH ::~

Kekadang hati bagai dicarik-carik.. melawan hari-hari..

Kekadang hati bagai ingin berhenti berdetik.. lelah mengejar mimpi-mimpi..

Namun biarkanlah.. biarkan..

Kerana bagiku.. semua itu telah sebati..

~:: ***::~

~:: tAbAh ::~

Adakalanya aku berharap hati ini lebih tabah.. lebih kuat bertunjangkan iman.. lebih kental berpaksikan kebenaran.. Agar aku sentiasa gagah menghadapi dugaan.. Agar aku sentiasa hidup dalam kehidupan..

Jua agar dapat aku menjadi lebih dari aku.. 

~:: *** ::~

~:: sEmEnTaRa ::~

Hidup ini bersifat sementara.. yang dulu indah akan hilang serinya.. bila diratah masa.. bila dimamah usia.. Jika yang indah dulu dipuja... yang buruk tertinggal kini begitu sahaja...

Bagai menanti waktu reput tanpa sisa.. dan terus hilang selama-lama..

~:: *** ::~

~:: hAlAmAn SePi ::~

Bijak pandai pernah berkata.. setiap hari baru bermula dengan setiap helaian baru...

Terpulang pada diri.. untuk menggarap apa yang ingin dicatatkan dihelaian itu..

Berpandukan akal.. kitalah yang akan menentukan hari kita..

Kitalah jua yang memilih... kita jualah yang membenarkan perasaan kita melayari apa yang kita mahu rasa..

Apa yang terjadi disekeliling kita .. bukanlah alasan untuk menentukan apa yang kita rasa..

Tapi apa yang kita memilih untuk merasa.. itulah yang akan kita rasa..

Tapi bagiku ia tidaklah semudah itu..

Kalaulah ianya semudah itu... kalaulah..

~:: *** ::~

~:: hAkIkAt ::~

Tiada yang dapat menghalang hujan membasahi bumi jika itu takdirnya.. Benar.. Adakala apa yang terjadi bukanlah apa yang dirancang.. Namun jika itulah yang ditakdirkan maka itulah yang perlu ditelan.. Itulah makna sebuah pengalaman.. Yang mengajar erti sebuah kesabaran.. 

Maka.. Apalah gunanya iman jika kenyataan yang mendatang redha untuk ditelan… Apalah guna akal jika cabaran tidak dijadikan sebagai peluang…

~:: tAfSiRaN ::~

Sentiasa aku cuba ingatkan diri.. bahawa manusia sering menyalah erti.. ada kala buruk apa yang mereka tafsirkan walaupun bukanlah bermakna buruk yang cuba kau berikan.. memang.. ada masa diam adalah yang terbaik.. namun ada masa diam itu menambah sakit..

Iya..aku harus sentiasa mengingatkan diri supaya tidak menyalah tafsir sesiapa.. sentiasa bersangka baik.. walaupun ada masanya aku yang terasa amat penat kerana sering disalah tafsir..

~:: *** ::~

~:: tHiS wOrLd Of MaSqUeRaDe ::~

This world of masquerade,

Killing love and raising hate,

When truth is no longer true,

And lying is all they do.

Trust is a sign of stupidity,

Waiting to be use without humanity,

Sincerity becoming a sense of weakness,

That will pull you deep into the darkness.

Goodness is no longer can be seen,

Just something that has become extinct,

The world has turn into this masquerade,

That killing love and bringing hate.

~:: mOvInG pLaCeS ::~

Remember in my previous post that I said that I wanted to be far far away.. well.. seeing the stats of my blog actually although I am standing still somewhere my pages of thoughts had gone places to most of the places that I've never been..

How I marvel the technologies.. for me it prove how incredible the human brains works.. and then lead me to believe how great the power of the creator that give this gift of wisdom to the human being.. 

Maybe somewhere in the other parts of the world there is someone who appreciate what I've shared here :)

~:: mEmOrIeS ::~

I've just finished reading this book.. Honestly said.. I can't put this book don't once started reading it.. the plot is intriguing, although as usual I had able to guess the ending before actually finishing it does not stop me from continuing reading it..

It brought a different insight.. a question you will asked yourself of the "thing" that I think most of us took for granted.. our memory.. beginning with how one mistake can changed your whole life.. shows that how without memories.. you will loose your identity.. and how without it you are open to danger of being manipulated..

~:: *** ::~

~:: a StOrY oF roSeS aNd A BeAr ::~

There was once a man who was cursed to be a bear..  Because he breaks the heart of the one who love him.. This bear carried around a magical bouquet of roses in his arms.. The roses was actually a piece of the bear’s heart that makes him feels and alive..

To break the curse he was given a responsibility to find those who can truly cherish the roses.. If the roses dies or gone without him able to fulfill his task.. he will be no more than just a stuff bear without a heart and feeling.. But if he found the one that will cherish the rose and care for it with all her heart.. the rose will turn into a garden of roses that will bloom all year.. it will let it sweet and lovely scents throughout the kingdom.. and bring peace and joy to the kingdom.. and the man will be turned into a human again..

But the rose was different from other roses.. it was not as beautiful.. it was stiffed and dull.. it had thorns as sharp as needles.. and will only blooms to a beautiful rose to those who appreciate it and passed all the test with patience and time..  

One day the bear found the one he thought would appreciate the rose and took his risk by giving the rose to her.. She gladly took the rose and cherish it for a while but then she get tired of caring for it.. so she left it to die.. For to her the rose was too dull and had nothing to offer her.. 

Though feeling sad.. The bear accept the fact and went on finding another who can appreciate his rose.. For he can only gave one rose at a time or the magic will not happen..  Sadly.. his rose was kept be thrown away by the one choose by the bear..  

Years went by and now the bear only had one more rose in his hand.. With every rose he gave away he feels that he had becoming more lifeless.. so the bear sat there thinking whether to take one last risk or gave up to wait for the inevitable to actually happen...

~:: lOsT ::~

I saw a lost kitty.. wondering alone by herself.. not knowing where to go.. shaking and crying with fear.. 

I tried to help her.. but she gets more afraid.. that I would hurt her.. or take her far away..

She cries for her mom.. but couldn't find her.. she wonders around.. still shaking in fear..

I go to her again.. feeling sorry for she's so lonely...she look up to me then.. with her eyes that is so lovely..

I carried her close.. so she wont get cold.. her cries gets more slow.. for knowing I would bring her home..

Then I saw her mother.. acting so upset.. I place the lost kitty near her.. and I know that she is glad...

The mother hold the lost kitty close.. and than took her away.. and I know now the lost kitty is home..

For she is where her love one is..

~:: tHeN cAmE tHe SuN ::~

The night is coming,

And the darkness closing,

I feel like I’m drowning,

With no chance of surviving.

Having lost my way,

To the hurt and pain,

With no words to say,

But just tears in vain.

But then came the sun,

With the ray of light,

And the hope of what’s to come,

Slowing shines bright.

~:: hArUsKaH mEmIlIh ::~

Pilihan datang dalam setiap waktu... Pilihan yang akan hadir bersama kemungkinan..

Bagaimana harus ku tahu apa yang tepat untuk dipilih.. Mungkin dengan menetapkan apa yang ku mahu di pengakirannya, adalah panduan yang tepat untuk membuat sesuatu pilihan itu..

Tapi bagaimana jika aku sendiri tak tahu apakah sebenarnya yang aku mahu...